At Home With Herbie

Merry Christmas

2011-12-21T12:37:00.004-08:00

Not a festive pic - Herbie has another histiocytoma, under his chin this time. He also has a new blanket, an early Christmas present. Underneath his bottom at the moment is the foil that I'd baked some chicken in. Holly would like it, even though he's licked it clean, but as he's lying on it, there's no chance she'll get it tonight.

Herbie is quite arthritic now, and as he suffers gastric problems with most anti-inflammatories, all I can do is give him painkillers and Cortaflex. At some point I expect his back end will go, and that'll be it, but for now he's still my rickety old boy. Who won't share his foil with anyone.

Roll on Christmas. Lots and lots of foil.

Almost Hallowe'en

2011-10-30T10:05:00.000-07:00

The clocks have just gone back, and I've got a whole extra hour to do all the things I've been putting off. I took the dogs to Wigtown a couple of weeks ago, the Scottish book town. It was quiet, out of season, and I have to wonder how long they can hold out against t'internet. I hope we don't lose the joy of bookbrowsing entirely - there's nothing like finding the book you never you needed, or even that such a book existed, just in the course of wandering through a shop.

Galloway, where Wigtown is, is very green and full of cows. We stayed near Whauphill, where there was a big shiny red tractor factory, or dealership or something - we always knew we were nearly home when we saw a long row of tractors. There's not much in that part of the world, but there are good beaches close at hand.

Herbie is very creaky, but he comes to life again when he sees a cat.

Phew...

2011-10-01T11:31:00.000-07:00

.. it's a scorcher, 27 degrees centigrade. This is the weirdest weather ever. Or else a divine punishment for buying three months worth of toilet paper just in case the snows come early this year. I might starve, but I will not run out of toilet paper in a hurry.

The dogs begged for a walk at lunchtime, so I took them to the arboretum. After a hundred yards, they both turned to me with a "Remind me why we came here?" expression, so we went home again, pausing only to sniff a very shaggy Scottish terrier who had obviously grown a thick winter coat that wasn't needed just yet. I find the expression on floor-level black dogs hard to read, but this one was clearly saying he hadn't bargained on this heat.

My sister's cat was hit by a car last week, and now has a broken pelvis, broken cheekbone, and one eye stitched shut in an attempt to save his sight in that eye. He's at the same age as the last one, Solly, was when he was hit and killed - that adolescent/adult border age, when they haven't quite understood about cars, or think they can outrun them. He's now on cage rest for six weeks. He looks a mess at the moment. Unlike my sister, who has hair again, and eyebrows.

At work, they have decided to reorganise, again. Parts of the outfit are still working through the last round. It's keeping us all on our toes.

Autumn Again

2011-09-13T12:46:00.001-07:00

... and Herbie is his usual lively self. We're seeing out the tail end of Hurricane Katia. It's not often we get hurricanes here, but this one has taken down a few power lines. I have a wind-up radio, and a wind-up LED light, and today my hands are sore from all the handle-turning. Tomorrow I'm going out to buy a tiny battery-powered radio.

Anyway, the power's back on, my neighbours have shared their tales of dire suffering ("we had to eat corned beef and pickle sandwiches") and the man at the end of the road, who clears up trees, has had a bonanza, and a lot more firewood. It's been good to have a reminder of what the weather can do before it gets bad. Holly, however, is unimpressed. She's currently performing her impression of a very small hedgehog.

Another wet summer

2011-08-14T11:16:00.000-07:00

... I don't know why I'm surprised, it is England, after all.

Herbie is more arthritic when it's raining, so he's spent much of the time in his favourite horizontal pose. I've been painting things, moving furniture round and re-organising the house ready for winter. I've just bought a pair of Yaktrax as well - the theory is, they stop you slipping on icy roads. Last winter Holly was tugging to hurry me on, while I took little tiny steps, tottering like an eighty-year old in stilettos, holding on the hedge for balance.

My sister's finished chemo, and her hair is growing back. She looks as fuzzy as a baby chick. Probably not the image she's going for, but she's also still here.

Still Here

2011-07-12T07:40:00.001-07:00

A summer cold, so confined to quarters. There's a lot of it about. Herbie's becoming quite stiff, even with all the Cortaflex, but he's still here. So's my sister.

It sounds a bit gloomy, but I am starting to think about winter. The hawthorn berries are turning red, and already the rowan trees beside the church are heavy with scarlet clusters. It's a month early for all that. I've just ordered two loads of logs, and a copy of Laura Ingalls Wilder's "The Long Winter". It's not just a nostalgia read, it's an essential part of my winter preparations. This year I'm picking out a winter library. We don't normally have extreme winters here, so when folks from further north say, "Well, gosh, don't you guys have snow tyres/ snow shoes/ window quilts/ snow blowers" or whatever, the answer is, no. But this year I'm going to read up and prepare. So far, I have a year's supply of Earl Grey teabags in a kitchen cupboard. I may have a little more work to do.

Idling

2011-06-09T12:35:00.000-07:00

I'm not focusing on anything much this week. My sister's not been well, so I'm a bit preoccupied. Herbie's had something wrong too, a digestive upset, and although he's over it, he's still fragile. Instead I've been reading the Tiny House Blog and thinking maybe I could give up everything except the dogs and live in a small shed somewhere. If it wasn't for the planning laws, I could sell this place and buy a little patch of woodland, and live in a hut in the woods. Somewhere with lots of rabbits for the dogs. Or even a pheasant.

Bad Blogger Award

2011-05-28T11:52:00.000-07:00

I've been really slack about writing, the last couple of months. It's the restructure at the office: I come home and don't want to go anywhere near a computer in case more work leaps out of it.

I've also been busy reading Sandra Steingraber's "Living Downstream", about the environmental causes of cancer. It's a great read, if not a little depressing, but it makes it quite clear how many potential carcinogens are out there, and the rise in lymphoma cases both in humans and dogs may well be directly related to the rise in environmental toxins. The author developed bladder cancer at a young age, as did some of the older members of her family - but she's adopted. It meant she could discount genetics or an accumulation of poor lifestyle choices, and looked to the environment. Sometimes you read a book that completely changes the way you think about things, and for me this is one of them.

Herbie is still here, but beginning to look a little frail. I'm having to work to keep the weight on him. It's a problem with elderly sighthounds, they turn scrawny. Holly, on the other hand, needs work to keep her waistline trim. She's always had barrel-shaped ribs that look wide on a small greyhound. I suppose once she's Herbie's age I can stop worrying.

Hommage a Kandinsky

2011-05-02T08:44:00.000-07:00

... or anyone else who used a lot of blue. I painted the front door. Herbie decided to kick the paint can against the wall, and then walk in the paint, then run through the house to his bed. As Queen Victoria so famously said, "We are not amused". We now have a new doormat until I can hire something that will sand off Dulux Weathershield 10-year guarantee outdoor gloss.

We Are Eleven

2011-04-17T11:21:00.000-07:00

His Royal Herbiness has just celebrated his eleventh birthday. Unlike hobbits, he won't live to see his eleventy-first birthday, but I'm pretty happy with eleven. The Cortaflex HA (with hyaluronic acid) seems to have given him a bit more flexibility, and he's no longer pushing his hips into my hands, saying "Rub my rear", so I'm assuming it's doing something.

Happy Birthday, old white-faced dog.

April At Last

2011-04-04T12:13:00.000-07:00

... and Herbie's still here. I've been offline for a couple of weeks, trouble with my broadband and my PC, but I've patched up something and can finally get my net addiction fed again. It's only when you can't view anything online that the twitching sets in... Holly is looking sleek and glossy on her new diet. I finally realised she is somewhat allergic to chicken, and since I cut chicken out of her diet completely, her fur has become incredibly silky. I can't believe it took me so long to realise. It's been a dry spring, but even so, Herbie is creaking a bit, so he's on a double dose of Cortaflex to see if that helps at all. He's an old boy now. Which is what I always wanted to see.

Where do the weeks go?

2011-03-15T13:17:00.000-07:00

I can hardly believe how long it is since I last posted. Herbie has recovered from yet another injury, but has lost his nerve when it comes to tackling stairs. He will jump in and out of the car, but steps are a problem. I need to take some more pictures of him. He's become even whiter-faced this winter.

Holly is going all out for Peskiest Greyhound in the West. She has a low boredom threshold, and wants to be entertained all the time. Still, we're all here, and the snowdrops are too - which shows what a late spring it is, snowdrops in mid-March.

I have a job

2011-02-16T12:16:00.000-08:00

Fortunately I survived the cull, but some of my friends didn't. No real celebrations possible. It was a tough weekend, because Herbie ruptured a lymph node in his groin overnight. I have no idea how it happened, but it was an emergency trip to the vets on Saturday afternoon. He wouldn't eat, and I couldn't get antibiotics into him, so another trip first thing Monday, for an antiobiotic injection. The vet drained a load of fluid out of him, but he's still got a tangerine-sized mass. It's shrinking slowly, but it's not a good thing to happen.

He's still an invalid, and being waited on hand and foot. Nationwide chicken sales have rocketed, in order to tempt His Herbiness to eat. He wouldn't touch anything for a couple of days, but he's eating again. It's just the walking, and the stairs, but I hope he'll be able to manage them soon.

Herbie Says

2011-02-11T10:06:00.001-08:00

...thanks for all the kind thoughts on behalf of my sister. He's sending all his magic green-eyed healing power too.

Yesterday I had to interview for what used to be my job, or something a little similar. It wasn't good. I wittered. Obviously, if they need someone who witters on, I'm top of the list. Otherwise... I'm going to take the "Be here now" advice, and think about this next week.

First day

2011-02-02T12:13:00.001-08:00

... of chemo for my sister. She's having a lot of different types all at once, since her lymphoma is moving fast, but in the end they decided to hold one type over until tomorrow - methotrexate. It's one Herbie didn't have, but all the other names have come flooding back, bad memories I'd pushed to the back of the vault.

She's being very brave, telling me how the "wig and scarf consultant" will come and see her tomorrow while she's having her chemo. She had her hair cut really short last week, in preparation for the inevitable hair loss. I picked her up from the hospital this evening, and will again tomorrow.

There isn't really anything particularly good to say, especially as I decided not to pass on to her the one trying-to-be-cheerful thought the vet told me when Herbie had chemo: at least you won't need to worry about worms for a bit.

Temperature's Rising

2011-01-15T08:39:00.000-08:00

It's been above freezing all week! Wet, mind, but no slipping, no ice, no extra time to de-ice the car. Can't tell you how much better my mood is, despite a week or so of difficult happenings.

First off - my sister's been diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma. First Herbie, now... Ever feel the universe is trying to tell you something, to batter it into your thick skull with a brick, but you're still not getting it? Maybe there is no message, maybe weird coincidence, events do sometimes cluster, but... I don't know. She's going back for further tests.

Next, a colleague at work is in hospital with viral meningitis. She's off the danger list now, but was pretty ill. We received a memo assuring us that her office would be disinfected, but, umm, horse - stable door- bolted? The symptoms seem to be very similar to being at work, tired, stiff neck, in need of a lie down. It's brought out the latent hypochondria in all of us.

And finally, next week we get letters to tell us we're "At Risk" of redundancy, prior to interviews for our jobs. At least I still have the dogs.

Happy New Year!

2011-01-03T09:21:00.000-08:00

Well, we made it. 2011 is a new start. The roads are free of snow, and the dogs have been to some of their favourite walks again. Today feels a bit "last day of the school holidays", because in fact it is. I only went into work one day between Christmas and New Year, the rest of the time I've been at home, curled up in front of the fire mostly.

Holly is much calmer when I'm home all the time, and much more capable of going off upstairs by herself. Herbie's always been independent, and has always taken himself off to his (or my) bed if I don't look as though I'm doing anything interesting. Holly, aged six and a quarter, is finally learning this too.

The papers at the weekend were full of predictions about how horrible this year is going to be, and how the "phoney war" in economic terms is over, and we're now facing real austerity. Given that my current employer revised its redundancy numbers upwards just before Christmas, I think this is probably the case. Already the leaving drinks are happening, and there's no way we can shed one third of staff, in a relatively small city, without a huge impact all round. I'm so glad I did a reiki course, I keep murmuring, "Just for today, do not worry, do not anger." My motto for the year.

Good King Wenceslas Looked Out

2010-12-23T12:05:00.000-08:00

... and thought, "Enough with the snow already".

Merry Christmas, everyone. May you and your loved ones enjoy the festive season.

Three Years

2010-12-12T08:49:00.000-08:00

It was three years ago this week that Herbie had his last chemo treatment. When we went back after Christmas, I explained that the tumour had in fact grown, and this rescue protocol, his second, was losing its effect. The vet said the only thing we hadn't tried was potentially risky, and given that Herbie had suffered side effects from his last chemo, he wasn't sure it was safe.

It was such a shock to be told that we were out of options. The vet didn't mention survival times without treatment, but the books I had weren't optimistic. Still, three years later, the boy is still here, still eating and running around, just with a lot of tumours. I sometimes think that if he had a shorter nose, the tumours would have outgrown his head, but fortunately he's a greyhound. I've tried to do the right things with his diet, even though he is now standing by the bookcase which has the dog-biscuit tin on top, with what I call his "Bohemian Rhapsody" expression ("I'm just a poor boy from a poor family"), trying to convey to me that he could in fact die of starvation only half an hour after his evening meal if not given an immediate biscuit. Nice try.

He might be lumpy, but he's still here.

Worst. Winter. Ever.

2010-12-07T06:17:00.000-08:00

Snowed in for a week, roads not ploughed, two feet of snow, nothing gritted. Finally got out at the weekend. Thank the Lord I have remote access to the office computer system, so could work from home, but even so, cabin fever was setting in.

Now it's starting to melt, everything's icy so the dogs won't walk, it hurts their paws and they slide everywhere. Holly's bouncing off the walls with boredom. The river Ouse in York is frozen over (and it's a big, fast-flowing river). I never thought I'd say this, but I might want to live in a town again.

Snovember

2010-11-28T05:48:00.001-08:00

Worst November in - oh, lots of years. Six inches in two days. I've come off the road twice. I want my own hovercraft.

Unreliable Blogging

2010-11-23T12:41:00.000-08:00

It's the naughty step for me, for not blogging at least weekly as I'd promised myself. It's been another awkward couple of weeks, major repairs to car, leaking tap, winter vomiting bug (norovirus) courtesy of my co-workers, and just the general run of worries. It's OK now.

Herbie is wrapped in his duvet like a little greyhound parcel while Holly lies in the yellow cardboard wreckage of a biscuit box. We recycle - when we reach the end of a box of bone-shaped biscuits, she shreds the box into little pieces, then I gather up the pieces and put them in the fire. I just haven't got round to the gathering bit yet.

I've entered lots of competitions, and today I won a whole pound (£1) from my toilet paper - as a get rich quick scheme, it's not entirely working...

Fixed

2010-11-10T11:41:00.000-08:00

This week my leaking roof has been fixed, and the leaking kitchen tap has been fixed. I can now close the bathroom door properly too. (When you live on your own, you stop worrying about things like the bathroom door not being quite private enough, but you worry more about roofs and things.) Money can buy you happiness, whatever anyone says.

Herbie is lying at a weird angle, his body wrapped up in his bedding but his neck halfway across the floor so that he can stare into the stove. (The TV means nothing to him, but the fire is worth watching.) Holly has scraped her bed into a lump and is trying to bury her head inside it. Someone I work with joked about having ordered his box full of straw, and at the weekend he would climb into it and stay there till spring. I think the dogs are almost ready to do the same.

Antibiotics Again

2010-11-04T13:14:00.000-07:00

Herbie's picked up yet another respiratory infection. His paws and ears go all cold, and the tiniest bit of exertion makes him pant like a steam train. Fortunately the antibiotics kick in fast, and after two days of not eating, he's back to wolfing his meals down.

I've caught the comping bug, and have been glued to the competitions forum at moneysavingexpert.com. It stops me doing anything less/more productive, so this may or may not be a good thing. So far I've won £20 courtesy of Walkers' crisps (I now own enough bags of crisps to see me through to Christmas). Is it because I is bored? Probably.

Cold cold cold

2010-10-25T12:06:00.001-07:00

... and we are all snuggled up in front of the cast iron stove. A leak in the roof means that Steve the builder is going to come and take part of the roof off to fix it. Not looking forward to that bit, but we need to be dry this winter. Herbie has just rummaged through my bag to find the remains of my lunch, still in its little Tupperware box. I have let him have the equivalent of a couple of spoonfuls of rice, and he is so proud of himself for scavenging it, rather than being given it in his foodbowl.

Half Past Ten

2010-10-19T12:11:00.000-07:00

On Saturday, Herbie reached the grand old age of ten and a half exactly (or 10.30, as an elderly, and now more than a little absent-minded, neighbour described him). He's slowed down a lot over the last couple of months, and doesn't want to walk far in the mornings, but for a dog who's 10.30, he's doing OK.

In Pink - and In Disgrace

2010-10-12T11:26:00.001-07:00

Holly is all snuggly and warm in her new nightwear. However it will be a while before she gets anything else new - I've just had to pay a vet's bill (or half of one) for a neighbour's cat.

We were walking up our driveway at dusk on Friday, returning from a walk, with Holly still on the lead. Suddenly she lurched sideways at the hedge, and then stepped back dragging a cat by one back leg. I grabbed Holly's collar and made her drop it, and the cat ran off. I put a note through the neighbour's letterbox to say "if your cat has bitemarks on its leg, I'm sorry but it was us". Saturday the neighbour turns up with a vet bill for x-rays and painkillers - her elderly frail cat with a number of medical conditions now has a broken pelvis. The vet didn't think the cat would survive a general anaesthetic, but he thinks the pelvis will heal OK if the cat rests up.

Fortunately the neighbour was able to say "It was cats and dogs being cats and dogs" - she can't keep her cat out of my garden, and I can't guarantee my dogs won't lunge at cats hiding in the hedge, so we agreed to go halves on the bill. Even so. Holly had better not demolish any more cats. We were very lucky the cat survived.

A Mixed Week

2010-10-06T11:57:00.000-07:00

Today at work we found out the details of the restructure - it looks like there are five jobs for eight of us. Ho hum. And so it goes.

Herbie is very slow this week. It has rained a lot, and he's stiff when it's damp. Holly's new winter pyjama top has arrived. It's pink with sheep on it. I always swore I wouldn't end up the kind of person who dressed her dogs in fluffy pink clothing. Must have been lying to myself. Holly is rather puzzled by the concept of pullovers, as opposed to coats with velcro straps, but I have to say she looks pretty darn cute. There will be photos at the weekend.

One of those weeks

2010-09-20T06:16:00.000-07:00

... when everything seems to break down at once. First I was carless for several days, which could have been a disaster, or very expensive, until the garage kindly lent me an elderly car to get to work in. I think they mostly did it to stop me phoning twice a day.

Then I couldn't get online at all. Given that my tax return is due 30 September, this was another disaster in the making. As of today, I have a shiny new router, shiny new phone-point, and I've done my tax return. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that everything else continues to work. It's nice to have an upgrade on the router, and I wouldn't have bothered if things hadn't actually broken down - I'm used to maintaining a series of technological antiques, rather than being at the cutting edge. The BT engineer looked at my set-up and said, "Yes, we do occasionally see one of these - did the help-desk have to look everything up online?" Er, yes, actually. "You'll find with an upgrade, the help desk are actually able to help." Well, that will be a novelty.

The dogs liked the BT man a lot, and Holly was convinced he had come round specially to play with her. It was rather sad when she finally realised he hadn't, and she sunk down onto her bed with her face on her paws.

Happy 4th Gotcha Day

2010-09-09T10:51:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow it will be four years since I picked Holly up at a service station off the A1. She had been in a council pound for six weeks and her time was well and truly up. If I hadn't said I could take her, there wouldn't have been any options left. Via a complicated chain of people and events, she ended up with me, skinny, wormy and semi-feral. (Er, she was, not me - think I need to do something about that last sentence.)

She still has her semi-feral moments, particularly when she spots a cat, but she's considerably chunkier. On the plus side, she had no expectations about living in a house, so when Herbie told her what to expect ("Oi, that's MY bed"), she went along with it quite amiably. Four years later, she's still here, still stealing tissues to shred, and still the sweetest little weasel-face.

Autumn Already

2010-09-03T12:29:00.000-07:00

Judging by the berries in the hedgerows, it's going to be another harsh winter. The haws, sloes and elderberries hang in heavy clusters, and this morning we met the grit-men, leaving piles of rock salt in little heaps along the roadside. We're on top of a steep hill here, and at every bend in the hill there is now a neat pyramid of salt.

Herbie's recovering from his dental, and no, he can't whistle through the gaps in his teeth. Holly probably could though - the middle two of her bottom front teeth were worn almost to stubs when she came to me, aged almost two. The vet said she'd probably been chewing the wire of a kennel to achieve that effect, out of sheer boredom and frustration.

No teefies

2010-08-23T12:25:00.001-07:00

I've been trying to sneak up on Herbie to show you that he's got no front teeth any more, but he keeps catching me, and rolling over so that I can't get a close shot. The gums over his front teeth had receded quite badly, so his little incisors had to go. He also lost the carnassial on his lower left side. Now, when he's happy, his jaw vibrates but his teeth don't chatter. It's sad. But his teeth aren't brown any more, and that's a huge improvement.

Now, every evening, I have to try and remove any food from his teeth with a cotton bud dipped in chlorhexidine mouthwash. When the vet first suggested it, I thought "Touting for more business, are we? Bowel surgery next time?" Herbie has a long history of eating toothbrushes, tubes of toothpaste, trying to swallow the little rubber finger brush (but fortunately, although it went down his windpipe, he coughed it up again. ) Things I have learned from brushing his teeth: aluminium from metal toothpaste tubes will dissolve in hydrochloric acid. Dogs' stomachs contain concentrated hydrochloric acid. And also, greyhounds are big enough that a snapped-off toothbrush head will pass straight through. Things I wish I had not had to learn: see above.

Phew

2010-08-11T08:00:00.000-07:00

He's back, minus six teeth. His remaining teeth are all sparkly white. There was a tricky moment, apparently, when the vet was trying to anaesthetise him, so they ended up taking an x-ray of his lungs. No lung metastases, which is good news. Herbie's had breakfast, and a little potter, but he's feeling a bit sore. Still, he's back in one piece, which is the main thing, and I think the vet is almost as relieved as I am.

Teefies

2010-08-08T11:22:00.000-07:00

Herbie goes to have his teeth cleaned next week - he may lose a few more teeth. When he's happy, his teeth chatter, and it saddens me to think that I may not hear that sound again, but it is so beyond time that his teeth were cleaned... Some greyhounds have difficult teeth, and Herbie has needed his teeth cleaning every 9-10 months, even with daily toothbrushing. Holly, on the other hand, has been with me for four years now and not needed one dental. Similar diet, better teeth.

Tail Ends is Ending

2010-07-26T12:00:00.000-07:00

We're all still here, but an era is drawing to a close at Tailends, the greyhound hospice in Devon. One of the founders, Angela, died earlier this year, and her partner has decided not to take in any new dogs, but to let the existing cohort live out their days. Given that most of them came to Tailends on their last legs, that may not be very long. They have done amazing work for the last couple of decades.

I am going through the usual summer lull at work, and am very bored. Fortunately a kind friend has sent me a boxed set of Flight of the Conchords, so at least I can hum silly songs to myself. I'm very much enjoying the dead-pan New Zealand take on life in New York.

And finally, a sad farewell to Soly, my sister's Maine Coon cat. Something got him, out in the fields. He died out hunting, which is possibly how he would have wanted to go, but we were all expecting him to last a bit longer than he did. Rest in peace, Sol.

Dentist Time

2010-07-20T12:45:00.000-07:00

Herbie's eating again, but his teeth are in a terrible state. My vet, this time, said she might be feeling brave enough to tackle them. Having spent 18 months thinking he could go at any moment, she, like my previous vet, had been reluctant to put him through a potentially risky operation. Now his teeth are really really bad, despite toothbrushing and mouthwashes.

So. Huge decision. We're going to do it when Lucy is back from her holiday. There's always a risk, with general anaesthetics, but this time... not going to think about it too much. Instead I'm going to go put dry trousers on, Herbie's just wiped his face all over what I'm currently wearing.#

Thanks for all the good wishes. Herbie seems to react badly to almost everything these days.

Drug reaction

2010-07-13T11:50:00.000-07:00

Still here, but it's been a difficult week. Herbie was prescribed Previcox last week, to help with his stiff back end, and on his third dose a reaction set in - diarrhoea with strings of fresh red blood. OK, I thought, a soothing diet. Fine for a couple of days, then off his food completely.

Fortunately, just as panic was setting in, and he wouldn't eat anything with painkillers concealed inside so he was reluctant to go for walks, and I was worrying about quality of life - he decided he would like some yoghurt. And some of Holly's food. Tonight he ate boiled mince and then realised that while he didn't want my cooked blackcurrants, he would definitely like some custard. It's not something I'd recommend as part of a balanced canine diet, but for a dog that's been turning his face away from all food... I might even make him some more tomorrow.

End of June

2010-06-30T12:56:00.000-07:00

... and Herbie has picked up a little. I'm lurching along from day to day. I took some time out last Sunday to go to the Jerry Green annual open day, and Holly had her first go at some agility equipment. She hated it, so there went that idea.

There was a large German shepherd/husky cross in the end kennel who looked at me then said "Mow" in exactly the same tone of voice our old cat used to use when he wanted you to know he was a poor old neglected cat who'd been left out in the cold. It was as if he was saying "Get me out!" but I can't. I don't have the right life for that breed. I hope he finds his family soon.

Midsummer

2010-06-21T11:53:00.000-07:00

... and he's not doing so well today. He's eating, but he hasn't wanted to walk anywhere much the last couple of days. It's sunny, but it's not baking hot. It's not a good sign.

I found the blog of someone else who's done CV247, which worked OK on Herbie, in that the tumours stopped growing while he was taking it. Heidi is 14 and has been taking CV247 for a year or so. It's nice to hear of older dogs doing well.

Everything at work is up in the air, yet again. New government, change of funding, rules, etc, and we were due to shed a few people over the summer. The number of posts going is increasing, and the latest view is that 30% of staff will have to go over the next 3 years. As I'm not a frontline worker, it's not looking good. Budget tomorrow. I suspect baked-bean manufacturers may do well, looks like the entire nation will be living off beans on toast for the foreseeable. I know this sounds Eeyorish, maybe I need a holiday.

We have been reading

2010-06-09T01:55:00.000-07:00

... the Stay at Home Bookworm blog:http://stayathomebookworm.blogspot.com/ I love finding recommendations from someone who reads the types of book I like.

Uh oh - I feel an expensive trip to Amazon coming on. If only it were possible to block websites yourself, to stop yourself going there. Of all my vices, the bookspending one is one of the least under control.

Hot at Home

2010-06-05T12:02:00.000-07:00

... and I'm trying to swap Herbie and Holly from winter walk-times to summer walk-times. There's always a tough couple of weekends when I have to persuade them that we don't have a walk at lunch-time, it's too hot, and we don't do evening walks until late.

I cracked today - every time I went into the hallway, the two of them rushed out and looked at their leads meaningfully. In the end I couldn't stand it any longer, and took them to the arboretum. When I got there, the lady at the gate said, "It's quite hot for a dog-walk." Yes, I know - would you like to explain it to these two? We had ten minutes of panting and snuffling, and then we went back home. I'd like to think I've made my point, but I suspect we'll have the same routine tomorrow, until I learn to stand firm.

End of a long hard week

2010-05-21T11:11:00.001-07:00

... so Herbie is having yet another lie-down. He's not been very well, perhaps because it's turned warm. Last week I was scraping ice off the windscreen every morning before driving off to work, this week I'm in a T-shirt and sandals (oh, and trousers as well, I'm going out fully dressed). (In case anyone was wondering!)

I've just started studying physiology and anatomy, so that I can get onto a canine massage course. I dropped biology a long time ago, so now to get onto this course, I'm having to do a pre-qualifying course and both my brain cells have had to stretch a bit. I'm doing it for the challenge, and it certainly has been so far. I'm going to be great at Scrabble after this, though - just learnt that the xiphoid is a lump at the bottom of the breastbone.

Elections and Rhododendrons

2010-05-12T12:25:00.000-07:00

First we had an election, but nobody won. Then we had a weekend, and went to Nawton Towers to look at their rhododendrons. They only open for half a dozen weekends a year, mostly in spring, because they have a fabulous collection of rhododendrons in every colour - I'd never seen blue or yellow rhodies before, and the yellow ones have a beautiful scent.

In the car park/ field, there were some stumps of wood, and I was careful not to park right on top of them, but there was one that was shaped very much like a rabbit. As I got out of the car, I was thinking, it's a very similar brown, but so obviously a dead tree. Then Herbie got out of the car, and the "dead tree" bolted for the fence. Herbie got all the exercise he needed right there in the car park.

And then, a few days later, we got a prime minister. And his new friend. Coalitions, eh?

Now I Know...

2010-05-04T11:49:00.000-07:00

... what to do with surplus dog hair:

http://matteroftrust.org/programs/natural.html

Admittedly greyhounds don't shed vast amounts, unless they're losing their kennel coat when they go from being kennelled to being indoor dogs, but if I had a lot of spare hair, I'd be sending it to Louisiana or wherever right now.

If it's Spring...

2010-04-26T10:48:00.000-07:00

... it must be time to paint something - in this case the upstairs landing, where the leaky roof left water stains down one wall, and the bits of my bedroom I didn't get to before I moved in. The roof was fixed in November, but I haven't been able to face painting before now.

There was an interesting piece in the Telegraph on Saturday, about Prozac slowing tumour growth in people with lymphoma. It ties in with what I've suspected about emotions and cancer being linked - improve the mood and slow the progress of cancer. I still feel guilty that Herbie developed cancer about four months after we moved house. He was a nervous, traumatised dog when he came to me, and he felt safe in that tiny little house with low ceilings, and upstairs windows almost at floor level. I was tired of hitting my head on the beams and having to duck every time I went downstairs, and wanted somewhere bigger. But for Herbie, that house was somewhere he had come to trust, and feel safe, and I took him away from it.

There's no going back, though.

Ten Today

2010-04-16T11:31:00.000-07:00

His Royal Herbiness has reached the grand old age of ten. To celebrate, he has just spat rice all over the carpet, then wiped his face on my ironing pile. Happy Birthday, old boy.

(Another favourite recycled picture.)

Happy hounds

2010-04-13T11:38:00.001-07:00

Herbie has seen his old friend Guinness several times this week. She is 13 ,but she still manages to run towards him with a fair turn of speed, and I find it touching to see two older dogs rushing up to each other to say hello and sniff, their creaky joints forgotten.

I've been reading an online dog magazine, or rather the free copy they have online, at Dogs Naturally. Plenty of interesting articles, including one on the increase in cancer cases.

I am working hard at the moment, coming home scrambled every evening, to face a Holly who wants to play. It's the longstanding dilemma of dog-owners, staying employed while also being a good dog-parent. I haven't come up with a solution yet.

Now Easter's over...

2010-04-06T12:09:00.000-07:00

... it's election time. I think I am going to get a box set of DVDs and not watch any TV for a month, in order to avoid the next few weeks of improbable claims and promises.

Are any of the parties going to do anything to help dogs? I should cocoa, as my grandmother used to say, with both eyebrows raised. Free dog-biscuits? Dogs allowed in shops? There are six million dog-owning households in the UK.

In the meantime, I've discovered a handy site full of hints on dog nutrition and health, Dogaware. Much more interesting and useful than party political broadcasts.

Snow on the Way

2010-03-30T11:24:00.000-07:00

... again. We are not amused. Herbie has been to the vets for his three-monthly check, and he has put on a whole pound! The vet looked worried when we first came in, and I'm sure she was thinking, "Is this the day I have to say it's time?" but after she'd listened to his heart, she smiled and said "He's OK, considering." That last word covers multitudes.

So we skipped off home, and I had taken the day off work, so we could go to the arboretum, and then we curled up on the bed for the afternoon. Apart from the vets, it was a perfect day.

Then and Now

2010-03-23T13:00:00.000-07:00

Three years ago (almost) I was worried about a small lump. I'm still worried.

White Faced

2010-03-16T12:43:00.000-07:00

Herbie had a black face, once upon a time, but he has become a venerable snowy-faced old boy. I was asked how I keep his face so clean, and had to say "Oh, he does all that himself."

There is a reason why I have blankets over much of the furniture, and a reason why I mostly wear old jeans at home. After each meal, Herbie will walk the length of the sofa one way, sliding his face along the surface, then turn and wipe the other side of his face, again along the entire length of the sofa. If I am standing up, he will then come and wipe his face against the back of my legs. I've learned to change out of my work clothes fast.

Holly, despite being a dainty girl, is much less bothered, and going out with legs covered in tomato sauce is normal for her.

Still here

2010-03-09T12:08:00.001-08:00

Older, more tired, as messy as ever... but we're still here. Thanks to all for the good thoughts - they really help.

Frailer now

2010-03-02T01:40:00.000-08:00

Herbie's been unwell over the weekend. I think it was another respiratory bug, but he didn't eat for 48 hours (apart from one blueberry yoghurt, and he spat out all the blueberries, so his bed had purple spots). The vet had given me some emergency antibiotics, which I used, and he's recovering now, but he goes downhill so quickly, and he's lost weight.

I'm not sure either of us can survive much more of this.

Bound to Get Better

2010-02-25T08:37:00.000-08:00

Apparently after 40, life gets better and better until you're 74. So there is something to look forward to, after all.

The first snowdrops are out, but it's going to be a very late spring - this time last year they were over. There's no sign of the tulips I planted, but since there was more snow last weekend, they may well be lying low. There was still ice across the lake at the arboretum today. I decided to work from home, and I'm glad I did. It's been grey and dank the whole time, and the ground is waterlogged. Herbie's not too interested in going out much, but he's very interested in the thought that there may be some ham in the kitchen. If he needs more exercise, I'll just hide some ham around the house.

Recycling

2010-02-16T09:45:00.000-08:00

... and that includes photos. Herbie looks exactly the same as he's done for months, so this is a photo from before Christmas.

It's been a busy week. Nigel's baby, William Thomas, arrived in the early hours of last Wednesday - needless to say, the car had iced over at the point when Mel realised she needed to go to the hospital NOW, so poor Nigel was frantically scraping ice off the windscreen at 2 in the morning... at least they got there, unlike this poor couple.

Then another member of the team at work left to join the NHS. And another person at work who left suddenly on Friday looks uncannily like the picture of an Irish woman suspected of being a hitwoman in Dubai. Now we're all going to be wondering... (Actually we think she was here at the time the murders were carrried out, but fiction is so more gossip-worthy than the truth.)

And finally, to add to all the excitement, I took the day off so I could get the chimney swept.

Missing Coal

2010-02-09T12:46:00.000-08:00

Feeling a bit vulnerable tonight, got home to discover a fair bit of coal missing. I'd filled up the coal bucket last night when I got home, and used the entire bucket during the course of the evening. I didn't have time this morning to re-fill before work, and when I went out to the coalshed this evening, there were only half a dozen lumps of loose coal left. Fortunately there are still a couple of plastic bags of e-coal (a supposedly ecological alternative to coal) but I'm annoyed that while I've been out someone's come into my back garden, gone round the back of the house and stolen several buckets of coal.

I know it's been a hard winter, I know many of my neighbours don't have much money, but hey, I don't either. I've been trying to be careful with my fuel, which is no use when someone else is siphoning it off (wrong metaphor, but can't think of the right one). I used a couple of months' worth in three weeks over Christmas and early January, so my winter fuel budget has not quite worked out, but I don't wait till my neighbours are out and then go steal theirs.

This blog wasn't meant to be a rant about anything, it was supposed to be about Herbie, but tonight it's about me, and I'm cross. I can start padlocking the shed, but I can't stay home all day, I have to work. Where I used to live, it was safe to leave coal in an unlocked container. I want to move again.

Happy Candlemas

2010-02-01T12:23:00.000-08:00

One of those old pagan festivals that we've lost is Candlemas, the first of February, when at dusk the lady of the house was supposed to light a candle in every window. I get home from work somewhat after dusk, but I've lit some candles tonight in recognition of the fact that the light is returning. It may be cold, but there is more light than at midwinter.

Herbie is clutching a marrowbone to his chest, while Holly has both a bone and a vegetarian dog chew in the shape of an alligator, which was a present from my sister. I'm not entirely sure why they need vegetarian chews, given the amount of meat I feed them, but it has kept Holly happy for a long while.

A friend at work is waiting for his first baby to arrive. His wife wanted a whole new kitchen installing in the fortnight before the baby was due, so we are taking bets on which is ready first, the baby or the new kitchen.

Plodding

2010-01-25T11:05:00.000-08:00

... through the endless wastes of January and then February. This is always a bleak time of the year, and my mood will lift when the daylight returns. One thing that lifted me before then was reading Susan Chernak McElroy's blog here. I've admired her books for a long time, so it was wonderful (and somehow strange) to find the author in person.

Someone who's off my "admired" list, though, is Dara o'Briain, whose greyhound was euthanased after she broke a leg in a race. It's a fixable injury, and there's a charity in the US, Greytlegs, that specifically pays for surgery for racing dogs who break a leg, so that they're not killed for an injury that would be treated in a domestic pet. Shame there isn't a branch in Ireland, but then the aforementioned comic, who is never off the TV, can't be so short of money he couldn't afford a vet bill. Particularly not after just appearing in a happy little programme showing him travelling across Ireland with the aforementioned greyhound, Snip Nua, and two friends. Unfortunately I now have to boycott one of my favourite TV programmes, "Mock the Week". Such is the price of principles.

Sighs of Relief

2010-01-18T11:57:00.001-08:00

The snow has almost gone, and the temperature is now a balmy 7 degrees centigrade. I feel human again, a human no longer under siege. Parts of the North Yorkshire moors are still difficult to reach, but here in the foothills, normal life has resumed. I feel tired, though. My grandmother used to speak of people she knew as "won't last another winter", and I know how that feels right now.

Apparently today is Blue Monday (3rd Monday in January is the time when most people will feel terrible) but I was vastly cheered by the kind comments. I've had to put comment moderation on again, due to receiving weird Chinese spam - thanks again to Lesley for pointing out what they might mean in translation. Somebody's trying to improve their search engine rankings the bad way.

And finally, although his owner died, Gollum the Italian greyhound found his way back home. My thoughts are with Gollum and Andrea's family.

Bad Weather Blues

2010-01-14T12:18:00.000-08:00

It's been four weeks now since the first snowfall, so I wasn't best pleased to find another inch fell overnight last night. While I haven't yet had to crawl across the road, the last couple of days have been ludicrously icy, and I've been driving to work at 10 miles an hour until I reach the main road.

I am tired of this now, and my patience with the dogs is at a low. They are sliding around on the ice, and Herbie isn't too happy, but Holly doesn't care if she pulls me over every time she sees a cat. I am thinking "treadmill" for Holly, and wondering if Herbie should be walked at all. I would just like to be able to go for a walk and get to the shops without skidding. Just for a few days, at least.

Snow Day - Again

2010-01-05T08:19:00.000-08:00

Once more unto the snow shovels, dear friends, once more...

A gloomy old man in the village told me that the long hard winter of 1962 started like this. "It were bad before Christmas, and it stayed bad till March." Oh great. People keep ringing to tell me where they've been stuck, how long it took to get out or be rescued, where they came off the road, where they had to spend the night, etc.

I've taken today off work because the local radio announced that my route in, the only gritted route, was blocked. It's not the day for back-roads driving. We've had snow cover now for almost three weeks, which is rare for these parts.

Herbie had an emergency visit to the vets on New Year's Eve because he started coughing and wouldn't eat. One lot of antibiotics (Noroclav) later, and he's back to normal. However I'm starting him on Tramadol, a painkiller, because he seems to be a little brighter on them. The snow is not kind to old bones.

RIP Honky Duck

2009-12-29T06:28:00.000-08:00

We had a sudden death in the family, but not the one I was dreading. Honky Duck has honked his last honk. He was a short-lived Christmas present for Holly. Honky Pheasant is three years old now, and a little threadbare, so I thought a duck in the same vein might be fun. Holly didn't think so.

Herbie's lump hasn't been to the vet. The snow and ice a fortnight ago were too dangerous, I couldn't drive the two miles to the vet. She very kindly said over the phone what she'd have said to me in person - if it's less than a centimetre, leave it be for now. So I'm just keeping an eye.

Happy New Year everyone, and hope you all last a bit better than poor Honky.

Merry Christmas

2009-12-20T09:03:00.000-08:00

We've had loads of snow, no way will this all melt before Christmas, so it's a white Christmas for us. Herbie's staying snuggled up in bed, but Holly is out hunting - so many footprints to sniff, so little time. Happy seasonal whatsits to everyone!

Lumpy knee

2009-12-15T11:48:00.000-08:00

As if there wasn't enough to worry about, Herbie has something that isn't quite a scab, and isn't a tick either, a small round lump just under the skin, about the size of a piece of lead shot. The vet can't see us till Friday morning, because it's not an emergency. I never tell them that things are urgent unless I'm pretty darn sure, but I worry anyway.

Snow predicted for tomorrow night, and the following night, and the one after that. I've got one new book to read, thanks to Borders closing down and everything is now half price, but it's sad to see the empty shelves, the last few books huddled together like refugees. It was once the bright future of book-selling, but now... It's my own fault for buying books from Amazon. RIP Borders UK.

Dude, Where's My Car?

2009-12-08T12:33:00.001-08:00

The car's been out of action for a few days, the brake warning light came on, threatening dire things if I didn't stop immediately. Herbie's been in a sulk all weekend. The weekends are for car trips, and he was quite annoyed that I was deliberately depriving him of his outings.

Fortunately the garage couldn't find anything wrong, and think the switch may have become waterlogged with all the rain we've been having. But it'll be Saturday before Herbie gets another car ride.

First Ice

2009-12-01T12:18:00.000-08:00

Slippy this morning, and Herbie refused to walk down the hill. Last night's rain had frozen in the night, and though the ice-flowers on my car were pretty, it was treacherous underfoot. We scuttled back home and had an extra helping of breakfast.

The arboretum has now shut for the winter (presumably to let the grass grow back), so Herbie's going to have to get used to walks up and down the hill close to home. Right now he's curled up on the red dog bed, while the stove pumps out heat, and Neil Oliver talks about Scottish history on TV. Holly has turned a dog bed and a duvet into an intricate nest. We are settled in for the night.

A Dark and Stormy Night

2009-11-24T13:24:00.001-08:00

... again. Nothing to report, but at least we're not flooded, like all those poor people in Cumbria. My roof was fixed just before the storms started, so I'm dry, my roof tiles are all still on, and I'm grateful. The dogs are both in their fleece jackets for the night, and I'm off to bed. Less than a month now till Christmas.

Wet and windy

2009-11-17T12:03:00.000-08:00

... so the dogs are curled up in front of the fire. I've just used a "Chimney Cleaning Log" on my cast-iron stove - I stupidly used some damp wood on the fire a couple of days running, and ended up with sticky black creosote inside the stove. I'm hoping this log thing will be a miracle cure.

One of the things I like at the arboretum are the old tree-stumps that have been carved to look like toadstools. Someone has added little doors and windows to a few, and for some reason it amuses me.

I'm already bored of winter evening walks, juggling two leads, torch, poo-bags and gloves. This evening the wind stole the poo-bags from my hand, and trying to find black poo-bags in the dark is impossible. It's not often I miss street-lights, but tonight... Only another three months until it starts being a little lighter. Something to look forward to, eh?

A Sunny Day

2009-11-08T10:10:00.000-08:00

... at the arboretum, Kew at Castle Howard.

As usual, I have plenty of photos of Herbie's bottom disappearing off into the distance, and far fewer of him actually looking at the camera.

One of my favourite trees here is the Arizona cypress. There are several, and they seem to do well in the cold damp North Yorkshire climate.

Herbie seems to be a little better this week.

Thank You

2009-11-02T11:51:00.000-08:00

... for all the kind thoughts. Herbie has rallied a little, though he's still drinking too much. Cowprint is right about needing to find new foods. Last weekend things were looking pretty bleak, but he's wanted to go for walks again, and he is finding things he can eat.

I'm not sure how long he can keep going, but he's just been hunting round the kitchen in case I've dropped any food in there. And he was happy to say hello to the three young witches who stopped by on Saturday night. The green face paint didn't upset him this year.

Kidneys failing

2009-10-26T13:38:00.000-07:00

It's been a bad weekend. Herbie's drinking double or triple his normal amounts, and not wanted to eat much. On Sunday I managed to persuade him to eat a yoghurt for breakfast (normally a rare treat) but he wouldn't touch his evening meal. We went over to my father's, and after Herbie had done his "I'm a poor old dog" routine, he ate the cat's food, and was rewarded with more cat food. Later I heard an odd scraping noise in the kitchen, and realised that Dad had left a chicken carcase near the edge of the table, and Herbie was helping himself.

Being allowed to steal food is currently working, but we've reached the stage the oncologist warned me about in January 08. There's nothing can be done about failing kidneys, though there is some good advice from Greyhoundgang about low phosphorus diets (rather than low protein) that I'll follow. He's lost a lot of weight in the last three or four days, and my policy of "keep 'em fat" (again, advice from someone with a cancer hound - normal rules of dog-keeping go out the window) is no longer working.

Nine and a half

2009-10-21T10:41:00.001-07:00

The new red dog bed has been quite successful, and the old brown and gold stripey one has been scraped off the top to use as a pillow. These pictures show the odd kink at the end of Herbie's tail, where I think he's broken it at some point in the past. The second bone up is much thicker than the ones above and below.

I've just done some Quantum Touch training - more powerful than reiki, and I need practice now. It's weird how a short course can completely change your point of view. I've never particularly wanted to practise on humans, but for this, I can see the point. Without the feedback from someone who can speak, you don't know if you're making a difference. Many of the other people on the course were already professional therapists of one kind or another, and it showed in their professional manner, putting the "client" at ease, and so on. I'm so used to dealing with dogs that my idea of calming signals is to make little burbling noises, and say "Who's a poor old dog then?" rather than ask people to relax, take a deep breath, etc. etc. Lucky for humans that I don't intend to practise on them professionally.

Must Take More Photos

2009-10-12T10:22:00.000-07:00

I had a day working from home today, which was great because it meant we could go to the arboretum at lunchtime. Herbie was so happy sniffing round all the trees, and as he hates to get his feet wet, I don't have to worry about him jumping into the lake. (We occasionally see spaniel owners trying to push a bedraggled muddy heap back into their car at arms length - no matter what colour the dog was when they left home, he/she's black now!)

Holly has a new red dog bed which she's happy with, after an initial day of uncertainty. What with the new bed, and the new stove, she is toasty-warm - and so is Mr. Herb. Winter is allowed to happen now, we have heat.

Slowing Down

2009-10-06T10:48:00.000-07:00

... or not? I've spent the last couple of days worrying because Herbie's been lagging behind on walks, not showing much interest, and I've been thinking "uh oh, bad sign".

Tonight he saw Guinness, the black lab, a few hundred yards away, and sprinted off to see her. I think he's just bored. The trouble is, he's also a very conservative dog who doesn't take well to change, and if I take him somewhere new, he spends a lot of time trying to herd me back to the car. Greyhounds may have no interest in herding sheep, but they can definitely herd humans - put a pair of greyhounds on the lead on a rainy morning and see what happens!

More Ramblings

2009-09-28T11:12:00.000-07:00

Herbie seems to be tiring more easily now. He's asleep nearly all the time now - more than usual for a greyhound. He had a nosebleed last night.

There's someone out there trying to raise the profile of canine cancer - take a look at "2 Dogs 2000 Miles" and the walk to Boston. I'm with them in spirit, even though we're 3,000 miles away.

And for light relief, I've been reading about a tragic Saluki hostage, forced into servitude with (shock horror!) a completely ordinary family...

Zebra!

2009-09-20T11:07:00.001-07:00

At weekends, I take the dogs to an arboretum nearby, 100 acres of trees and paths that they can wander round. It's a favourite place for dog-walkers to go, but also for people to take children to, so they can let off steam.

As we arrived, a toddler was being carried back to the car. She saw Holly and did that backwards lean that always alarms parents, and shouted "Zebra!"

Her mother said, "No, dog."

"Zebra!"

"Greyhound", I said.

"Zebra!"

"Just because it's black and white doesn't mean it's a zebra", her mother said.

"Zebra!"

We all gave up. Holly's a zebra.

You Know How Sometimes

2009-09-14T11:55:00.000-07:00

... you're just idly wandering round the web, and then you find something so random, you have to come back and tell people about it? I was following a link that said "cancer survivor" and I found this:
http://www.utne.com/2008-03-01/Arts/Pretty-Knitty-Titties.aspx

The ingenuity of people never ceases to amaze me.

Sire, sire...

2009-09-07T12:20:00.000-07:00

... the pheasants are revolting... so now I have 18 pounds of minced pheasant in the freezer that the dogs won't touch. My local Freecycle doesn't allow adverts for food...so how am I going to offload this stuff?

Holly has decided she won't eat raw food at all now, it offends her principles or something. Herbie is happy to tuck into raw tripe, and the diced heart was a huge success - though it seems to leak a huge amount of blood all over the kitchen, but he wants a cooked evening meal. If I give him raw food in the evening, he ignores it and tries to barge Holly off her food if I turn my back on them. They are fed in separate rooms, so in theory this shouldn't happen, but if I walk away, or answer the phone, an element of "What's in the other bowl?" creeps in.

I thought I was being so clever, doing a bulk buy of raw food. Erm, apparently not.

Two Years Ago

2009-09-01T09:12:00.000-07:00

...today, Herbie got his diagnosis of lymphoma from Cambridge Veterinary School. It was a nightmare drive, six and a half hours due to something on the motorway, and I was jammed between junctions and couldn't get off, so I was late for my appointment, and I phoned them in complete hysteria and they told me to calm down and just get there as soon as I could.

I had to leave Herbie with them for tests, and as soon as I reached home (four and a half hours this time) they rang, to say "It's lymphoma". It hadn't shown up on an earlier biopsy, despite removing the entire swollen node. This time it was obvious from drawing fluid off one of his nodes, but they kept him in for x-rays, to see how far it had spread.

The next day I drove back to pick him up, and he was so happy to see me again - I hope he didn't think he had been abandoned for good. I was then handed a piece of paper that told me his chemo protocol, 26 weeks, mean survival time 6-8 months. I thought, you do 6 months of chemo and then the moment you stop your dog dies? This does not sound good.

And now Mr. Lumpy is still here, and had just refused to eat his yummilicious raw pheasant, so I'm going to have to cook the stuff to see if that makes any difference. It had better, I've just bought a freezer-full because it's nearly organic. I didn't think Herbie and I would be arguing over diet this far down the line.

Not Yet Autumn

2009-08-24T11:46:00.000-07:00

... even though it feels like it. To add to the autumnal feel, I have been reading animal ghost stories at Project Gutenberg.

Not that I'm particularly haunted. The only things in this house that go bump in the night are greyhounds. (The Cornishman's prayer goes: "From ghoulies and ghosties and long-leggety beasties, and things that go bump in the night, Good Lord deliver us.")

Herbie's already playing with Christmas Teddy. (Mainly because Easter Chickie is still in the car.)

Another Monthiversary

2009-08-17T12:29:00.000-07:00

... on the 16th, and Herbie is now 9 and a third. Still plodding along and looking under his bowl in case I may have hidden more food there.

I've just finished another one of my birthday books, "Wesley", about a barn owl of that name, whose human now blogs here. I know what everyone's getting for Christmas! It's like Marley and me, except with a badly-behaved owl instead of a lab. I laughed out loud when Stacey O'Brien described running down the hallway shouting "Not for owls!" whenever Wesley was poking his beak in where he shouldn't - it's pretty much what I say to Holly and Herbie: "Not for nogs!"

And funnily enough, they know what I mean.

What Would Buffy Do?

2009-08-11T11:17:00.001-07:00

I asked Holly that very question, and she said "Kick the fridge door open with one mighty blow, and devour the entire contents". Hmm, what about the slaying? "Oh, yeah, right, the slaying... there's some fish pie in that fridge, you know."

Herbie's more of a Xander - if there's trouble, it's best to head the other way. As you may be able to tell, I was given a copy of "What Would Buffy Do?" last week for my birthday, froma dear friend who knows I'm a big fan. It was also the week of Herbie's fifth "Gotcha" day - dog birthdays aren't always a known date, particularly with rescue dogs, but you can always celebrate the date you got your dog. It's odd, Herbie's been sick for two years and four months, almost as long as the time he's not been sick. Two years and eight months of healthy life with me - even if the first few months were spent putting weight on him, and hoping his fur would grow back (it did!)

And while on a film/TV related title, I received a surprise comment from the Real Lumpy Addams - now indeed all grown up!

Hard to Know

2009-08-03T12:15:00.000-07:00

... if Herbie's in any pain or not. He seems older and stiffer than he was last summer, and he doesn't particularly like having his lumps pressed. He doesn't flinch, he just gives you a look that says "Do you have to?" I've talked to the vet about this, because she says pain is inevitable at some point, but if he doesn't seem too subdued, and isn't flinching when you touch him, he might be OK. It's the "might" part of the sentence that worries me.

Equally, long-term use of painkillers can have side-effects, so giving drugs unnecessarily ain't good either. He's on glucosamine for the stiffness. He ran a few races in his day, and he's just come back from pinging up and down on the lead trying to get at Billy Blue, the opposite neighbour's cat. It's like a Wii Fit for greyhounds - show them a fleeting image of a cat, and they're jumping up and down. My arms are growing longer by the day. I'm sure if you took measurements of people's arms BG and AG (Before Greyhounds and After Greyhounds) there'd be an inch or two difference.

Another week

2009-07-27T12:29:00.001-07:00

... another peculiar photo, and no real news. Herbie is lumpy, Holly and I need more exercise, and this morning a large brown hare came running towards us at full pelt. It took the hare a few seconds to realise I was walking two greyhounds, and then it stopped with an expression that clearly said "oh carp" (to quote Dilbert) and turned. Herbie set off in pursuit, but he's not up to a lengthy run these days. Holly stood on her back legs and yelped with excitement, and frustration at not being off-lead.

The one piece of quite old news I have is that Raven, who had a full bone marrow transplant in Australia, has had a recurrence of lymphoma. It's sad, because I thought it would fix lymphoma for good, but obviously not. It's not available in the UK, and rare in the US, so Raven is a pioneer in many ways - as well as being an agility champion. My good thoughts go with Raven and her people.

OK I was wrong

2009-07-22T10:29:00.000-07:00

It was swine flu after all. The woman who infected a load of people at work was lying when she said she'd been tested and it wasn't swine flu. Someone else at work who passed it on to their asthmatic kid had the test done, and the child tested positive for H1 N1. Great.

As soon as I realised I wasn't well, I stayed home, but I spent a day or so in the office feeling strangely tired, and one of my workmates is on immunosuppressant drugs for a longstanding illness, while another is asthmatic. They've all been exposed to my boss, and are still fine - the incubation period is quite short, so I don't think I've infected them.

All I can say is, it's not as bad as ordinary flu - if you're a healthy adult. The dogs behaved beautifully, they understood I wasn't well. My sister posted groceries through the letter box, I quarantined myself for five days, and now I'm fine. It's odd having flu in summer. Glad that's over.

Chipmunk

2009-07-15T09:54:00.001-07:00

Poor lad.

He's been refusing his CV247, so he's now on a lower dose, which isn't really keeping the lymphoma at bay. He's also been spitting out his homeopathic medicine, and once you've touched it apparently the potency is gone. I found a cache of little white pills when I hoovered under his bed. Richard Allport has said to crush the pills and add to his water - all the "goodness", or whatever the right word is, is in the outer coating, so if he absorbs a bit in his drinking water, it will have some effect. I learn something new every time I speak to him.

Not too brilliant myself. There's a summer flu doing the rounds at work that ISN'T SWINE FLU - so we're calling it Piglet Fever, and I seem to have come down with it. A couple of days of feeling like I've just had 15 pints, without any of the fun. I've slept lots, and hope it's shifting.

It'll Be Lovely...

2009-07-07T08:45:00.000-07:00

... When It's Finished. That's what I keep telling myself. The spare bedroom has been a no-go area ever since I moved in. I knew it would be a horrendous job,pulling off several layers of peeling and torn wall-paper, and this week I'm proving myself right. Two of the layers are vinyl, that just melts onto the wall if the steam-stripper gets too hot. And the walls are full of nails and staples - where a strip of wallpaper was coming loose, the previous occupants just stapled it back.

The dogs are happy because I'm home - I've allocated a week of precious holiday to redecorating and being At Home With Herbie - but work is beginning to look like an easy option. This project could take months. It's more like archaeology than decorating.

Just Chilling

2009-06-29T12:36:00.000-07:00

... on our very cold tiled floor in the hall. It's warm outside, but the hallway is cool, so we've each got a mat on the floor.

The dogs are happy first thing in the morning, and roll over for tummy inspection time - a morning ritual. As soon as it's obvious I am actually going to get out of bed, rather than lie there groaning, they like to roll over and wave their legs in the air. Then of course I have to get up to tell them what marvellous tummies they have. By evening, they're both giving their celebrated impressions of a dead dog by the roadside, lying with their necks at impossible, fractured angles, and with their breathing scarcely visible. If I go over and check on them, they huff at me.

I had a great trip to Woolfest at the weekend. It's a long drive from here, 3 and half hours each way, but worth it. I've come away with a year's worth of inspiration and addresses. I now also want some North Ronaldsay sheep, that don't need shearing, their wool just falls off, and they're little and cute, and... I have nowhere to put a sheep. And Angora rabbits are out of the question, given Holly's hunting abilities.

Bad IT Day

2009-06-22T12:32:00.000-07:00

Just as some people have bad hair days, I've had a bad IT day at work, with no connection - problems with my log-on apparently. When I had the nerve to say, after lunch, that I couldn't do anything until they fixed it, the IT helpdesk guy said it was all the fault of our department's service level agreement. Huh? We signed something saying we agreed it would take all day for the helpdesk to fix anything?

Very glad now to be at home with Herbie. Home is where the PC works first time, and there is food in the fridge - oh, and a giant ironing heap left over from yesterday. Went to the annual Jerry Green dog show - could have happily acquired a 3-legged Staffie and a brindle boxer with half his jaw missing. I always take family with me to these things, so they can talk sense into me. The boxer was very bouncy, and Herbie's in no fit state to be bounced on.

Confined to Quarters

2009-06-14T08:38:00.000-07:00

A quiet weekend in, but not by design. Driving home after work on Friday, the gearstick came off in my hand as I was changing gear. Panicking, I managed to jam it into third, and succeeded in limping home the last four miles. There's a steep hill just before home, and you really need to be in first or second... just made it.

It's moments like this when you realise how English villages have had their services cut in recent years. Our village shop closed down three years ago, there's no pub, bus twice a day to Malton, er... that's it. Oh, and the lady with bantams down the road occasionally sells eggs on a cardboard box outside her house. If you want proper-sized eggs, it's a three-mile walk to the next village with a shop, and three miles back.

Still, it's left me with plenty of time for Herbie-observation. Miraculously, the nodes at the back of his knee have shrunk again. The CV247 is doing something. If only it could do more.

A Little Better

2009-06-09T11:52:00.001-07:00

I've had some world-class reassurance from Richard Allport's team at the Natural Medicine Centre and they think that even reducing the dose of CV247 down to 1ml twice a day would help. I've tried that this evening, and Herbie ate his yummy organic mince and red cabbage without noticing that I'd sneaked the drug in. We'll see how it goes.

Someone else who could do with a good thought or two is Laurie Kaplan, author of "Help Your Dog Fight Cancer", a book I found massively reassuring, and that I've recommended to a number of people on Greytalk and elsewhere. Laurie has recently had spinal surgery and is in recovery - read about her journey here. The pictures show just what a big deal this is - I hope she recovers well, and continues her good work helping dogs with cancer.

Totally Given Up

2009-06-07T12:02:00.000-07:00

I'm veering between apathy, despair and a teenage sort of a sulk. Herbie has been refusing his CV247 the last couple of weeks, so I've been resorting to trying to squirt it down his throat, which doesn't work and he spits it all up and... I've given up trying. Disguising it with a little curry powder in his favourite scrambled eggs doesn't work, he can detect it in sardines, he's doing everything he can to tell me he doesn't want any more. This weekend I finally listened. And cracked, and gave him biscuits, after he's spent 18 months on a carb-free diet.

Two years ago, I would have wrestled demons at the gates of hell to save him. Now, I can't even stop myself giving him a dog-biscuit. What is wrong with me? I think I may have finally accepted that I can't change the outcome, and I've given up. Last year, I echoed Edna St.Vincent Millay: "I know. But I do not accept. And I am not resigned." Now, I've reached: "Whatever..."

So tired. CV247 was supposed to save him, but I promised him after the last chemo I wouldn't do anything invasive. Holding him by his sore neck to syringe bitter liquid down his throat is invasive. I had to admit that to myself. So, really no more treatment. Painkillers when he needs them, that's all. And strangely enough, he's been bouncing about like a wallaby ever since.

No news

2009-06-01T11:38:00.000-07:00

... from me, but sad news over at Jenna's Tail - Jenna didn't make it. Sometimes blog silence means there's nothing much to say, but sadly it sometimes means there's plenty say, just not enough strength to put the words together. Run free, Jenna.

A sunny and quiet week here, but my attempts to put some weight on Herbie have led to dire rear. He's not losing weight any more, but I've had to mop the floor a few times. Still trying to get his stomach settled. Sigh. He's been baking himself silly in the back garden, lying out in the sun until he's too hot, then coming in and panting like a steam train. There's plenty of shade, but he likes to sprawl in full sunlight, and I haven't the heart to stop him.

Garden Envy

2009-05-25T10:27:00.000-07:00

This weekend has been the local village's "Open Gardens" weekend, raising money for the village hall. For payment of a small fee, you can nosy about in the gardens of those brave and industrious souls who are prepared to show their gardens to the public. I have admired golden hens and blue Lutyens benches, and rows of currant bushes and giant compost heaps, but I know deep in my heart, if I had an acre of garden, it wouldn't look like the ones I'm wandering round.

Any garden I have would be "Designed by Dog", and there would be no delicate little alpines in the borders (that die when wee'd on), nor would my lawn look like a bowling green. There would be long patches of couch grass (Herbie's favourite snack) and a long smooth bit for Holly to sprint on, as opposed to the cunningly curved vistas with artfully posed statues. One garden today had a lifesized fibreglass cow. I wouldn't have one of those, either.

On that subject, I went to the hairdressers, and Sharon gleefully told me of the tourist who had come in for a cut earlier in the week, and then asked the salon manager for colour as well. "But not like yours, it looks common. I want something more subtle." Of all the people I'd want to insult, it wouldn't be the woman with scissors (and peroxide) in her hands...

Losing Weight

2009-05-19T12:00:00.000-07:00

Not me, unfortunately, but Herbie. It looks like the CV247 was only able to stave off the inevitable for so long, and now he's going a little further downhill. His appetite is still excellent, so I'm giving him extra cottage cheese after breakfast. Maybe he'll eat tripe again. It was a tip I gleaned from Lurcherlink a long time ago, as a way of getting weight onto a scrawny sighthound, but Herbie was fed a lot of tripe when he first developed swollen glands, and was losing a pound a week despite eating till he was barrel-shaped. He ate tripe through the early weeks of chemo, and then started refusing it. I don't know if he'll associate it now with chemo, but it might be time to try again.

Tripe, even uncooked, is vile stuff. The Scary Parking Attendant in Helmsley has adopted a new Great Dane, a young male (of course he'd intended to get a middle-aged bitch!) whose owners were emigrating to New Zealand and couldn't afford to fly the dog out with them. The Dane was used to cooked tripe, but after cooking it once, the SPA's wife said "Either the tripe goes or I do." An intelligent woman, who had realised that the dog certainly wasn't going.

Fortunate for me, then, that I need to lose weight, I'm excused the tripe diet myself - but if that was all I had in the house, I would definitely rather starve!

Back Again

2009-05-10T06:09:00.000-07:00

Bit of a long haul, almost as if we'd had to invent fire from scratch. But finally, we have Stove (yet to be named - apparently named objects work better) in place, and although there's a fair bit of decorating to be done, I have a major sense of achievement. Also an empty bank account, but I know that as soon as winter comes, I will be very happy I've spent my money on heating.

Herbie let it all wash over him - he wanted to go investigate the builders and the heating engineers for ten minutes, then he'd had enough, and went back to bed. Holly, on the other hand, spent days waiting for her chance to escape, and finally took it, the one day I'd gone back to work and left the engineers to it. They managed to catch her (in fact she got bored, and trotted up the garden path and waited by the front door for them to let her back in) and were quite embarrassed when I got home. After all my careful warnings. She can't open the front door, but she can open all the internal ones, so Keep The Front Door Shut.

Slowly the house is returning to normal, or what passes for it in this part of the world. I wouldn't want to have to install new heating again in a hurry.

More From My Collection

2009-04-26T10:50:00.000-07:00

... of terrible photos.

Someone told that humans get red-eye in photos because the light from the flash reflects off the blood vessels in the back of the human retina. So what do dogs have in the back of their eyes, to get this green glow?

The dogs have been enjoying the warm weather; it's the first time this year that I've been able to leave the back door open all day, and they can potter in and out. Unfortunately Holly has discovered a bird's nest in the golden privet, and barks every time she can hear rustling. I've told her a hundred times "It's a bird, not a c-a-t." However she keeps on barking, up the wrong tree, and I have to go and haul her in and shut the door before the neighbours complain. If she spends the entire summer barking at this tree... I'm going to be keeping her in.

Herbie is plodding along. His nodes were shrinking the tiniest bit, but then I gave him some Metacam because I was wondering if he didn't look rather stiff - now they're back where they were. He seems a little stiff in the mornings now, but it wears off once he's walked a hundred yards, so it may be arthritis rather than cancer-related. He's been on so many other supplements I'd given up on the glucosamine. Back to the drawing board.

We may be offline for a little while, with the builder coming next week, and my only phone point is right next to where he'll be demolishing the old fireplace. I'm moving everything I can upstairs, including the computer, but we'll be back as soon as we can.

Happy Birthday to Meee!

2009-04-19T10:54:00.000-07:00

Herbie was nine on Thursday. If I'd known he'd reach this age, there'd have been fewer tears along the way - when he was seven, I thought it was his last year ever. Here he is, peeing on a branch brought down by the snow in January. I didn't saw it off then, and now I don't have the heart, it's his very most-favourite pee spot.

The trouble is, I only have a cheap digital camera and there's a long delay (1.6 seconds according to the manual) between my clicking the shutter, and the camera actually registering the picture. Greyhounds move fast when they want to, so however carefully I set up that perfect image of the hounds, most of my photos end up looking like this:

That's why I don't post pictures all that often. I have so many pictures either of their rear ends, or sleeping, that I'm bored. I don't have the patience to wait for days for that one perfect shot. I don't have Angela's talent for photography, that's for sure.

A Grey Easter

2009-04-12T12:28:00.000-07:00

Cloud, then rain, then cloud. I have been trying to spring clean, but Holly thinks this is very boring, and will only let me do boring things for half an hour at a time. Then she barks and runs around, until I take her out in the garden to play.

Herbie no longer wants to walk as far, so Holly isn't getting as much exercise as a young girl needs. If I take her without Herbie, she tries to herd me back towards the house, and lets me know plainly that I've forgotten something very important, i.e. Herbie. Mad moments running round and round the clothes airer are about all we can do without taking/tiring the old lad. He stands on the back doorstep, shaking his head, before plodding back upstairs to bed. He has to have morning and evening walkies, but no more than half an hour these days.

He's still swallowing his CV247, but he seems static. It's better than some of the alternatives. In a couple of weeks' time, a builder's coming to open up the fireplace to install a wood-burning stove, and I'm worried it'll affect him. It's been hard even keeping him stable, but I've waited four months for this stove to arrive. We may have to spend a few days in the car, parked somewhere with rabbits to watch, while the builder builds, or unbuilds. Some weeks, I think I've done nothing, but keeping things on an even keel is not nothing. I keep telling myself.

Almost Famous

2009-04-05T06:44:00.000-07:00

I was pleased and surprised to find Herbie inside this month's copy of Dogs Today. I'd emailed the editor to ask about CV 247, and subsequently sent an update on his progress, which appeared on the blog for pets trying CV247, but I wasn't expecting to see Herbie in print. I showed it to him, but he didn't seem too impressed. I think he wanted a photo of himself in his younger days, before his face went white.

There are still no miracle cures, but given that I wasn't sure he'd last long enough for the postman to deliver the first bottle, he's doing OK. He's stopped going downhill at least.

He's currently nursing a sore ear, after trying to sniff a cat's bottom. The neighbour's ginger tom didn't want his bottom sniffing, and swiped across the top of Herbie's head. Blood everywhere, and I think it's a vet trip for antibiotics tomorrow. At the time, I was mostly pleased that Holly hadn't despatched the cat, and hadn't realised Herbie was hurt, but later I found the trail of blood up the stairs, and realised Herbie had taken a direct hit. That cat has zero nerves. I do a cat-scan every time I open the back door, to make sure the garden is cat-free. This one decided to jump over the garden wall and stroll across a lawn with two greyhounds on it. I am trying to make sure the neighbourhood cats survive, but they're not making life easy for me.